you are deceitful, sir

Much as I would love to celebrate surpassing 20,000 words (a cool 73 pages), I just... ARRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Maybe it's the fact that I've been awake since 5AM or how I'm on my third cup of coffee or am dangerously close to the No Man's Land that's looming beyond what I've plotted in advance, but I am officially FREAKED. ALL CAPS FREAKED. 

You see, I've just introduced a character that I've been looking forward to for ages. While the 12 year-old protagonist might be unaware, he's crucial to her journey and *cough* a total stud. Yes, I know he's fictional, but I've rather enjoyed dreaming him up. "I just like to look at him!" Just smile and nod. It's okay. Anyway, he's a mysterious brooding sort of fellow and his entrance into the story was always something of a mile marker for me because it signals a serious shift in the plot. But, it turns out, not only is he prickly towards my little heroine, he's the same with me! It is like pulling teeth to get him to speak. I'm shocked, quite frankly. Up to this point, you've seen me praising my characters for having minds of their own. But this guy? He was always going to be stubborn, but I didn't expect him to be like that with me! I know what's made him the way he is, after all. This should be easy, right?! But here I am quoting Persuasion over and over to myself regarding this character i.e. "I am half agony, half hope." This all might sound like crazy talk, but needless to say I AM HAVING A BIT OF A BREAKDOWN! If I can't bring him across the page effectively, I'm in deep trouble. I'm already panicking about No Man's Land; I don't need to be worrying about this character. 

So let me tell you what I've done in an attempt to catch this cheeky bastard's attention and break down the barriers between us:

• buried my head in my hands, making anguished sounds usually reserved for those recently stabbed in the heart
• pulled my hair and screamed a little
• cried into my keyboard (I wish I was joking)
• had a dance party to One Direction's "Everything About You"

Thankfully I have the whole day ahead of me, but things are looking rather ugly right now. This just goes to show that it's always the pretty boys that give you trouble. Ugh. Not cute. Well, two can play that game, monsieur! I'm going to beat you into submission, because I'd much rather be fan flailing about Hook and Aurora from Once Upon A Time on this blog, thank you very much (soon, I promise!). On guard!